This is a contributed post.
Anyone who has ever been in a relationship will know that by their very nature, they are not necessarily stable, and you need to be aware of this and to make sure that you are consistently putting effort in to ensure that you can keep the relationship going strong. You can’t sit idly by and watch your relationship do its thing – you need to take an active role in it if you are to make the most of it. Of course, that does mean that you need to know as much as possible about what you should be doing on that front, and that is something that can be very hard to do off the bat. In this article, we are going to try and make this easier by looking at three steps you can take to improve any relationship. As long as you try these, you should find that you can lift your own relationship up higher without too much trouble.
Get Outside Help
There are many times when you might need to have some outside help to ensure the success of your relationship, and when that happens you should absolutely make sure that to you are getting that help. Of course it can come in many forms, depending on what it is that you are going through at the moment with your partner. You might even need to get hold of expert divorce solicitors, but hopefully for now it will suffice to have a mediator of sorts on board trying to help you out. This kind of mediation, or even therapy, can ensure that you are moving in the right direction on the whole as a couple, and is incredibly useful to seek out – so be sure to do that when you feel you need to, but consult each other first.
Without fail, one of the best things you can ever do in your relationship, especially when you think things might not be going too well, is to talk more as a couple. This is something that can solve most problems, and yet it is not the first thing that many couples do. If you can find a way to talk more together, you will find that it is much easier to get through whatever you are going through together. Even if you find it hard, you should find a way to communicate. That could mean writing down how you feel, for instance, or it might be that you want to broach the subject little by little. Either way is fine – just don’t keep it all bottled up inside.
A great practice that you can do together is the 5-minute exercise. Sit in front of each other, get comfortable and tell each other that this is a safe space where anything that is said will not be judged or dismissed. Now, for 5 minutes, one person says everything thats on their mind. The other person listens without interrupting. Even if person 1 doesn’t have anything to say after 30 seconds, keep silent, for they may build up the courage to speak more later. After 5 minutes, you swap. This is a great way to really hear what your beloved is feeling and thinking, so really try your best to listen and see their point of view.
Take the Time to Connect Physically
Quite often we wish for a better relationship but don’t actually take the time to improve it. You need to take the time to not just talk, but to truly connect with each other. It can be as simple as giving your partner a sensual massage or taking a tantric course together. We express a lot through our touch and it can work wonders for improving our sexuality and connection. Even just a 5-minute cuddle in the morning can set your day up for joy!
Why not go away for a weekend? Book a nice hotel somewhere peaceful, order some room service and enjoy just spending some time together. Most importantly – leave your phones at home and all the stresses that come with them! This is time for you, so take advantage of it!
Work on Yourself First
It’s not uncommon to blame others when a relationship starts crumbling down, but it’s important to remember that we may also be partially responsible. Without even realising it, we may subconsciously project our pain and traumas onto others, which can be devastating for you as a couple. For example, maybe your last relationship ended badly and you entered a new one pretty quickly, without processing everything that happened. You may bring your guilt and pain into your new relationship, causing it to crack under pressure.
Take some time for yourself, figure out what is the true cause of your pain and use any technique appropriate to heal it. Are you not experiencing sexual pleasures with your beloved? Instead of gossiping to your best friends about how lousy of a lover your boyfriend is, why not try some jade egg practices to heighten your own sensitivity to pleasure! Do you feel that you’re being triggered by some your partners actions? Talking to a therapist can be very beneficial at this point, they can help you dig deep and see how far the roots go and what you can do to heal it and move on.
Have Fun Together
Finally, remember that one thing you can always do to improve things is to make a point of having fun together. There are lots of things you can do, and as long as it is something that you both enjoy this is a great way to bond and to keep the relationship going strong. Of course, it is something that you will want to do regularly, so as to keep things going smoothly. So go out and enjoy yourselves and remember why you fell in love with each other in the first place!